Walk beside me

Marriages that are healthy reflect a husband and wife who show an equal partnership. One partner doesn’t show control and power over the other.

President Gordon B. Hinkley said, “In the marriage companionship there is neither inferiority nor superiority. The woman does not walk ahead of the man; neither does the man walk ahead of the woman. They walk side by side as a son and daughter of God on an eternal journey” (Ensign, May 2002).

I really love the imagery of this both physically and mentally. Couples who keep their steps in different strides to their individuality, yet still make conscious efforts to not walk ahead of the other with ill intent. Walking together, two people who respect each other; I imagine hand in hand with their fingers enlaced. How beautiful would that be? Certainly, this is a true partnership! Maybe some of us have this? Maybe some of us mourn this? Maybe, like myself, only dream of this kind of relationship. No worries though...I know the Lord has my life mapped.

This week I read a really beautiful interview given to President Gordon B. Hinkley and his wife Marjorie Hinkley from the Ensign magazine (Ensign, Oct. 2013). Now, this is a couple to look to! One thing I always remember about President Hinkley is how much you knew he loved his wife. The reason you knew this because he told us all the time! He really honored and loved her; his helpmeet (meet means equal). In the interview, Sister Hinkley shared spiritual experiences of how she was treated being the wife of the prophet. She said he never insisted she do anything “his” way or any way for that matter. She was recognized for her individuality and because of this made choices for herself. She was given space to make decisions and this she said, made her feel like a real person. He encouraged her to do what made her happy and never ruled or dominated her.

President Hinkley added he did this because he valued his wife, her personality and desires, her ambition and her background. So much respect and love here! WOW! He loved to see her develop her own talents and would marvel at watching her do so. He went on to express how strongly he felt about the importance that husbands should NOT run their wives’ lives and tell her what she should do because it will never work. That last part made me literally laugh out loud. Probably because of my mindset in having met so many righteous, and strong women in the church who are learning to stand up to such abuse. It will never work because eventually, that girl will learn. She will continue to walk with God and eventually… she may go. Or her very actions of standing up will turn her spouse to God, finally. No one, I repeat no one deserves to be mistreated and no doubt our Heavenly Father feels the same way about all His sons and daughters. 

The Savior of the world, Jesus Christ, said of those who would be a part of His Church, “Be one; and if ye are not, ye are not mine” (D&C 38:27) There it is. That says a lot about how we should treat our marriages. Unity comes to the couples who chose to respect and love one another, not tear, nor walk ahead of one another.  

LO12